My Health

OK, it has been a while, again, so I will break this up into a few entries. First my health. I went to the doctor about my blood pressure. I had been getting pretty high readings for about a month or so, so they put me on blood pressure meds. That stuff works great!!! My blood pressure is now lower than it has ever been. So, now that this is taken care of I can go ahead and get my root canals.

Now, during all of this my doctor said he would go ahead and run a full blood panel. He mainly wanted to check for diabetes, since I am overweight and have had two deep tissue staph infections in the last year. Evidently a cellulitis staph infection is mainly seen in diabetics. So, if you have never had this done, it is truly a fun process (feel the sarcasm). I go to the lab and they take my blood. First you wait in line with maily elderly people, not so bad. Then you are led back, after they finally call you, and the vampires in the back take a ton of blood. They then store it for future use I guess. No, really, they then test it for various medical issues and what not. They send the results to your doctor, and they call you to give you a stroke.

So, we picture me. I have just been given blood pressure meds and am anxiously awaiting the results of blood work. They call me at work and tell me they need me to follow up (already had that scheduled of course) because they found some issues with my blood panel. I tell them my follow up is scheduled and ask what the issues are. Wouldn't you guess, they cannot discuss it over the phone, it would be best if the doctor went over that in the office. So, I get to spend the next two weeks trying to keep my blood pressure under control until I find out what the issues are.

Of course, in the meantime I begin online research ofr anything that could possibly be wrong...diabetes, heart disease, high cholesterol, etc, etc etc. The day finally comes, I get to the doctor's office, they take my blood pressure, which is of course elevated, and then the doctor comes in. He is joking around, and then commented on my blood pressure reading. I remind him that there were issues with my blood work and I was anxiously awaiting the results and find out what to do next. I also let him know my blood pressure readings over the previous days had been very good, so just move along!!! He then tells me the only issue wa my cholesterol, it was about 10 points too high-------WHAT!!! I let him know I have been having a heart attack for more than a week, and he said his staff has done this before. Seriously. I am thinking they are trying to have fun any way they can.

Trying to have fun

So, we are trying to plan a fun Independence day weekend. We are making plans to go sit by the pool. We did get the PDD-nos diagnosis last week for our youngest son. He also has ADHD. He is a tough one to deal with sometimes. I love him with all my heart, don't get me wrong, and I would never want to change who he is. I would like him to be able to think about what he is going to say and how it will affect others around him. He has never been able to do that and feelings have been hurt on many occasions. So, last night we went to my mother in laws house. They have a pool out back, they actually have a gorgeous house and backyard. Now, her husband, the kids call him Pop, has taught every grandchild to swim, my oldest son included. My youngest son cannot swim yet. I was unable to swim yesterday for reasons I shall not mention, and my husband was having horrible back problems, so he could not swim either. My youngest son said he would like to be a grown-up already so he could swim. I told him Pop would be happy to teach him. His answer was "Whatever".....GRRRR. So, I change him to his bathing suit. While we are changing him he is combative and argumentative. I remind him that this is the perfect time, as we are not out there often, and he could learn to swim on his own and not have to hang on mommy and daddy in the pool. Well, he still is unable to swim at all this morning.

So, we will go to the pool today and he will spend his time in the shallow end walking around. He will get upset because we do not stay by his side the entire time, and he will get upset because he cannot swim. When I offer to help teach him he will decline. With the PDD-nos it seems, if he cannot perform an action with perfection right off the bat he does not want to try. This has been a source of frustration for all of us, and I know it is exceptionally frustrating for him. But, we do not know how to help him through this. It is like his thought process cannot run a full course. He cannot see the outcome of learning to master a task, he can only see that he cannot do the task and will be a failure. Since he already has stigma and feels that he is made fun of for the smallest of things, he will not even try to save himself the embarrasment.

We will be getting with the doctor for the best plan for the ADHD, the school and my nephews, who are watching both kids for the summer, will be thankful I am sure. We will also be checking into the outpatient therapy, the occupational therapy in school, and therapeutic horseback riding. We had never heard of this, but after talking with a few people it seems this could really help him. Luckily we live in Texas and it seems these places are all over here. There is one near Weatherford that my in-laws know about.

We have explained to my oldest son about his brother, but he is 9, so while he understands he is different it does not make dealing with him any easier most of the time. We try to make sure our time with each is evenly distributed, but between my oldest son's baseball schedule and my youngest needs, my husband and I feel torn at times because we end up with no time for ourselves. More on our adventures later.

The Pains of Life

Well, healthy lifestyle has taken on a whole new meaning for me. I went to the doctor last week after several blood pressure readings that were off the charts. While there he set me up to have some lab work done. He put me on blood pressure meds, which he said I will probably have to take for the rest of my life. So, fast forward to yesterday when they call and say they found something in my blood work and will need to follow up. I already had an appointment set for next week, and they were unwilling to go into details on the phone, so I guess they just called so I could worry for a week and a half.

So, now here I am. I have done this to myself. I have also made a decision. I do not want to die, and I do not want to be dependant on perscriptions. So, I have one choice. Make a change. I must get off my lazy butt, I must eat what I know I should eat. I am terrified, and my husband does not understand where I am. He has the ability to make these changes seem so effortless, and I think that is one frustrating part for me. They are not at all effortless for me. I guess perhaps I have an addiction, or perhaps I am just weak. Whatever it is, it has come to a point where I must overcome this or I WILL DIE. I will not see my grandkids, I will not see my children graduate, I will die and be miserable until I do.

So, today I start. I know it is mid-week, but there is no more starting on Monday for me. Today I will start trying to eat all fresh raw vegetables and fruit. I will eat mostly chicken and fish, but I hope to have 80% of my intake be raw fruit and veggies. I will begin with trying to exercise for 15 minutes a day and work up from there. No matter what, even if I have to walk in circles around my living room. I am tired of crying about this, I am all cried out at this point. I can no longer make excuses, because that is just what they are, excuses. I can do this, and I will do this. Until next time.

ICK

Well, we are still waiting to hear from the behaviorist, so there is that. Do you ever feel as though you are just crumbling apart, literally? That is where I am now. It seems that every part of my body is having issues. Right now the worst is my teeth!! I have 2 broken teeth. Now, I am neither a drug user nor am I one who ignores dental hygeine. I will admit that I have not been as militant about it as some people, but I pay more attention to it than say, my husband. He has not been to a dentist sine Reagan's first term and has nary a tooth issue. I go at least once a year and mine seem to crumble. WTF!?!?!?! I had one crumble earlier today while I was chewing a peice of gum. SERIOUSLY!?!?!?!?! So, we will be looking at enourmous dental bills coming up, not to mention pain and time off work that I cannot afford. So, I am praying about it. I am also crying a lot, since this will cost a fortune.

Now, how are the diet and exercise going you may ask (and you may not)? Well, you see how long it has been since my last post? You may think to yourself, man, she has been so busy exercising she has not had time to get on here! Well, you would be toally.....wrong. Why is this so hard to do? Why is it so hard to get motivated? Well, I am dog tired ALL the time. My ankles are swollen. Plus it seems every waking moment lately has been spent with my sons baseball team just about. As all moms know, we put everyone first, especially our kids. I am going to have to realize though, that putting my kids ahead of diet and exercise is really putting my kids last, since I will not be there for them as long.

Feeling Overwhelmed

OK, so, I have been wrestling with this issue with my son. His behavior has become more erratic lately. His teacher at school went out on maternity leave and he has a sub. It is also toward the end of the year, so his schedule is thrown off and he doesn't deal well with that. But all that aside, I just keep thinking about this diagnosis---yeah, the one we have not gotten yet. I keep thinking, is there something I could have done differently when I was pregnant? Why him and not me or my husband or my oldest son? I guess we really never will know why, and cannot really question that. This is the way it is and we just have to move on from there. All we can do is pray for guidance I guess. Enough ranting for now.

Well, life continues to be busy. I am still working, duh. I am still praying for my sister to find a job and for my mom. My mom is too sick to work right now. She has just been diagnosed with epilepsy, and she is evidently having little seizures all over her brain all day long. So, she is out of work until they can get that under control. My son's last regular season game was last night, they WON!!!! It really is amazing how emotional I can get at these games. I mean, I watch my husband when he sits through an MLB game, he gets so happy or so mad depending on how his team is doing. I always thought that is just dumb, it is a game being played by people you do not know. Now, of course I will get emotional because my son is playing, but still, it is just a game and I am so affected. I yell at the umpires. I know they are only human, but even an idiot could see the call was horrible. Anyway, we just have the tournaments and them the Select season.

We went for the behavioral testing on my youngest last week. They said that while he is not autistic (that is obvious), they do not beleive he has Asperger's either. They said that he does have some serious quirks, and this would probably end up being a diagnosis of PDD-NOS. I am still reading up on this. I love my little guy dearly, and I do not want to change him. I do, however, need some guidance on dealing with him. He cannot be disciplined as my oldest is, he is difficult to discipline to say the least. He also does not understand many of the social norms. But, we must wait on the final diagnosis, then figure out where to go for the next school year.

SLACKER!!!

Seriously, it has been a year since I posted on here? Shame on me. Well, the year has been filled with a serious roller coaster of ups and downs. I probably should have been posting on here, probably would have been therapeutic for me. I am still crocheting, I still need to lose weight, and I am still not a stay at home mom. However, I am planning to keep on blogging.

So, where to start. I still have the same job, and I still hate it. I think the hatred has become more pronounced, and I think it is starting to be reciprocated. But alas, what can you do. I still have a family to feed and cloth. My husband does work and makes good money, but he is changing jobs. He finally got a job where he can use his degree, but he will be taking a pay cut. My son is on two baseball teams, and man, that is EXPENSIVE!!! Do they realize these are kids....I have seen these little league baseball bats for $400!!! No freakin way I am buying that for my kid!! but, we still had to buy catcher gear, pay registrations, and there are the wonderful tournament fees.

The life of a baseball mom is busy, that is all I can say. We have baseball about 6 days a week, so we dress from laundry baskets, the house is always a mess, and we are hardly home. Seems we are only home long enough to make a mess and sleep anymore. But, one day, my son will be playing in the majors and supporting his wonderful mommy and daddy!

I did finish a few projects this past year. I made a mural of Portrait of Jesus, it turned out beautiful. I also made a few baby blankets along the way. I am now working on a bible cover. I found a few online, but none that really struck my fancy, so I am writing my own filet pattern for it. I will have to post a picture of the work in progress soon.

I am also going to try my hand at the wonderful world of self employment soon. Of course, I will have to keep my full time job whiel I launch things. I am setting up a studio in my garage and hope to begin airbrushing skateboards, batting helmets, and various other items soon. Once I am launched I can hopefully say goodbye to corporate America. What a wonderful world it will be then, at least my part of the world.

I will not bore everyone with the details of the last year. Suffice it to say I am glad that year has passed on and a new one has begun. I hope to blog more often, what is the use of this space if I don't?